Know Your Colts History: 10 Ways to Stop Adrian Peterson

N511866354_697496_5364_medium

Ladies and gentlemen, we knew coming in this week that stopping Adrian Peterson wouldn't be an easy task.  It certainly didn't help that the player I had pegged as a surprise Pro Bowler this season got cut (Thanks Ed!).  Despite that setback, I remain vigilant in my belief that the Colts can keep AP from running hogwild (jagwild?) on our defense.

Perhaps I'm delusional (likely), but I think if the Colts can execute some of these ideas to stop Peterson, they'll have a great chance on Sunday.

  1. Tell Adrian that it's hard to run long distances while balancing a football on his head without the football falling off.
  2. Eliminate any form of contact between Kenoy Kennedy and any of the Colts defenders.
  3. Have someone walk around the stadium carrying a sign saying "HAVE YOU TALKED TO YOUR MOTHER TODAY?"  It's hard to play at your best with that kind of guilt.  Of course, you run the risk that the Colts will take that message to heart as well.  Let's hope someone buy some prepaid minutes for the team.
  4. Do the exact opposite of what these guys did.
  5. Convince him that the real enemy is Christian Okoye.
  6. Try to sell him on the idea that he's the best gosh darn punter on the team and get him to act on his convictions.
  7. Lock him in a room and force him to watch Cedric Benson lowlights before the game.
  8. Find a large concrete statue and paint it so that it looks like Al Harris and hope that Adrian Peterson tries to run it over before the game.  Of course, if he destroys the wall, that would be a whole new set of problems, but let's not think about that.
  9. Surround him with journalists!
  10. Unleash The Great Wall of Bob.

Bobwall_medium

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior users will need to choose a permanent username, along with a new password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

I already have a Vox Media account!

Verify Vox Media account

Please login to your Vox Media account. This account will be linked to your previously existing Eater account.

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior MT authors will need to choose a new username and password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Stampede Blue

You must be a member of Stampede Blue to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Stampede Blue. You should read them.

Join Stampede Blue

You must be a member of Stampede Blue to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Stampede Blue. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9341_tracker