Know Your Colts History: Character in Numbers (1-33)

by JakeTheSnake on Jul 10, 2009 1:28 PM EDT Comment 8 comments

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The point of this week's post is simple: Sum up the careers of every player on the Colts. The trick is that I have to use the same number of characters as the player's roster number. This will be a three week series taking a look at the Colts roster. This week will focus on numbers 1-33, next week will be 34-66, and two weeks from now we'll look at numbers 67-99.

So this shouldn't be too hard, right?

Right?

#1 Pat McAfee: ¿

#2 Tim Masthay: Oy

#4 Adam Vinatieri: Kick

#6 Taj Smith: Dreads

#7 Curtis Painter: Purdue.

#8 Shane Andrus: Backup K

#10 Chris Crane: 4th String

#11 Anthony Gonzalez: Super quick

#12 Jim Sorgi: TheClipboard

#14 Sam Giguerre: Dude got guns!

#15 Brett McDermott: Don't get comfy

#16 Jacob Lacey: Kinda dorky name

#17 Austin Collie: Sounds like a dog

#18 Peyton Manning: Yeah he's a keeper

#20 Dante Hughes: << Marlin and Kelvin

#21 Bob Sanders: Tackled a shark today

#23 Tim Jennings: No relation to this guy

#25 Michael Coe: HE DEFENDED A PASS ONCE!!

#27 Lance Ball: The ultimate one hit wonder

#28 Marlin Jackson: I hope he hasn't lost a step

#29 Joseph Addai: Has a crucial year coming up.

#30 Travis Key: Doubt he'll be on final roster

#31 Donald Brown: Polian chose him, must be good.

#32 Mike Hart: Should be a great 3rd RB if well

#33 Melvin Bullitt: Vastly cooler than Steve McQueen.

2 recs | Comment 8 comments

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Comments

Brilliant!

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by BigBlueShoe on Jul 10, 2009 1:35 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Fun!

How can you not love a team that does this?

by LovinBlue on Jul 10, 2009 1:40 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Well Done! =-)

"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007

by peytonsthebest on Jul 10, 2009 1:52 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

awesome awesome idea

and well executed.

next time, try the same number of words instead of just characters—gives you more freedom to be funny, but of course makes it tougher on readers with short attention spans. Like Jets fans. The Ugoh entry would be a veritable novel.

Possible Sanders entry: Too small for the NFL. Hah! After he hits you, the only thing you will remember is the ever-lasting pain.

I hate Joe Namath. That's how long I've been a Colts fan.

by Bobman on Jul 10, 2009 2:55 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs

Ha! How about this:

Peyton Manning, #18:

When all is said and done he will be the best quarterback to ever have played the game

I didn’t even have to edit = it must be true.

"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007

by peytonsthebest on Jul 10, 2009 3:57 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

The only problem with doing # of words instead of # of characters,

is he’d have to write 97 words about Pat Kuntz and 83 words about John Matthews. That would be freakishly hard to do.

Now a proud annoyance on Stampede Blue, 18to88, Indy Football Report, and Phil B's blog.

Man, I need a life...

Random fact of the week from the empty void that is my mind: Joseph Addai, otherwise one as The Great Irrationally Hated One, is the first and only running back to rush for 1,000 yards in a season without starting a game in that season.

by Cassieper on Jul 10, 2009 4:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Yeah

I was originally going to do words instead of characters, but there’s too many practice squad players that I know little to nothing about with high numbers to make that a good idea.

Bullets Forever: A blog dedicated to the Washington Wizards with analysis, commentary, and more YouTube videos than your eyes can handle.

by JakeTheSnake on Jul 11, 2009 1:13 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs