Know Your Colts History: The Dallas Clark Edition
by JakeTheSnake on Sep 25, 2009 11:21 PM EDT
18 comments
Before we get into this week's screenshots, let me just hit one thing from last week: I don't hate Dallas Clark. I never have, and I never will. I think he's an incredibly goofy guy, but he's also an incredibly good fit in the Colts' offense. That was no more evident than Monday night, when Dallas gashed Miami's defense far worse than the Wildcat gashed the Colts' defense. If you still don't believe me, just check out my latest Facebook update:
If you don't get the joke, just watch this commercial and inform yourself. If you don't get all the love for Dallas Clark, follow me after the jump.
"Alright boys, I'm going to hit Dallas on the seam, we'll get a touchdown on the first play, Tiger Woods will slap me on the back, and then we'll go get some Gatorade. Sound good? Good."
"See? I told you."
"Hey Reggie, can you tell me if Gloria Estefan or not?"
"Dude, that's Jason Taylor."
More proof of why Dwight Freeney is awesome. Despite being tucked away at the bottom of the screen in this frame, he still manages to sack Chad Pennington, who is up in the top corner.
We should salute Freeney for that sack.
Now we're going to fast-forward to the end of the second quarter, right after Dallas Clark again gashed the Dolphins and set the Colts up for a field goal.
"Hey Adam, if you can bank it in off the pole, I'll let you drive my car home tonight."
"Idiot. Those wheels are mine."
"Crap, crap, crap. Now I have to get my keys and give them to the valet before Adam gets to them."
The sad thing is that the Colts only had the ball for 5 minutes in the second half.
"Bulldog 45 Z Cut on 2.
...
....
Sorry, I just wanted to pad our time of possession. BREAK!"
"I don't care what you say man, that's totally Gloria Estefan."
Only veterans get to use the benches. Rookies like Donald Brown have to sit on the coolers. The veterans are still willing to drink Gatorade from the coolers the rookies sit on, they're just not willing to reach for it.
"I'll pick up 55 on the blitz!"
"Actually, I've decided that I'm going to pursue my real passion in life: Auditing! Best of luck, Peyton!"
"Blue 42...
Red 7...
Five...
Five Dollar...
Five Dollar Footlong!"
I was wondering what happened to Zach Thomas.
The only thing that would have made Pierre Garcon's first career NFL touchdown sweeter is if he had pointed to the luxury box that Serena Williams was sitting him. You can probably guess what Serena told Pierre she'd do with the ball in his hand.
"HEY DALLAS, WE JUST WON THE GAME!"
"YEAH I KNOW, AWESOME RIGHT?!?"
"YOU WERE A BIG PART OF THE WIN TONIGHT! I THINK YOU SHOULD GET A GAME BALL!"
"THANK YOU! I THINK YOU WERE EXCELLENT AS ALWAYS!"
"I APPRECIATE THAT!"
"HEY PEYTON! WHY ARE WE YELLING DESPITE THE FACT THAT WE'RE STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER?!?"
"BECAUSE I DIDN'T GET TO YELL ENOUGH ON THE FIELD TODAY! ASHLEY ISN'T GOING TO BE HAPPY WITH ME THIS WEEK!"
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Two things:
1) As an auditor, I can say conclusively that blitz pickup is part of my daily responsibilities. Sorry Joe, maybe you can be an actuary.
2) I can almost see Peyton and Vinny making an “Off the goalpost, through the uprights, down the net, hit the ref in the shoe, roll around a bit, nothing but net” bet.
Bob Sanders eats a forest on Friday so he can lay the wood on Sunday.
http://monkeybiziu.deviantart.com
by MonkeyBusiness on Sep 25, 2009 11:53 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Jason Taylor
DOES look like Gloria Estefan lolol
As long as we have Peyton we will always have a chance to win.
by skywalker on Sep 26, 2009 12:58 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Interesting to see
how terrible Madden 07 looked. That was “next gen”, too.
by slash196 on Sep 26, 2009 6:20 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Dallas is the best male singer to ever come out of Indy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFPINdYY2Us
Swwweeeeeeeeeeet Caroline
by colts9318rock on Sep 26, 2009 7:09 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Good Job
But I’d really really love to know what is your definition of Goofy?
On another note, I was re-watching the beginning of the game, and there was a shot of Dallas and Peyton before they even put their helmets on to go onto the field. They were at the Gatorade station, and Peyton went up to Dallas and whispered something in his ear. Dallas nodded his head. And I’m thinking Peyton was saying, “Dallas, I’m gonna throw to you up the middle, you’re gonna go for a gazzilion yds, for a TD., I’ll look like a genius, you’ll look like Jerry Rice, and Tiger Woods will look real smart for picking the correct sideline to stand on.”
"You can't defend the perfect throw, what can I say?" Peyton quoting Marino
by Indy Lori on Sep 26, 2009 9:20 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Yep.
I noticed that as well. I think it was planned even before they took the field.
"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007
by peytonsthebest on Sep 26, 2009 11:57 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I think you're right. PTB, did you see Peyton's post game podium time?
One of the reporters asked him if he’s ever done that before on the first play of a game. He looked down grinned and said “well yes I have” then grinned some more. But the way he said it was with that Awe shucks Peyton-ness, that makes me want to smile for days just thinking about it.
"You can't defend the perfect throw, what can I say?" Peyton quoting Marino
by Indy Lori on Sep 27, 2009 12:39 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Goofy
Maybe that’s not the best word, but it’s all I can think of when I think of Dallas’ touchdown celebrations, his livin on a prayer dance (which sadly, has disappeared from the internet), and the fact that he got thrown out of a girls’ basketball game. He’s probably a down to earth guy in person, but all the newsworthy things that he’s done lead me to think he’s more of a jokester type.
Bullets Forever: A blog dedicated to the Washington Wizards with analysis, commentary, and more YouTube videos than your eyes can handle.
by JakeTheSnake on Sep 26, 2009 3:17 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The touchdown dance I've seen him do is,
when he takes the ball and weaves it in and out between his legs using one hand then the other . I love it. But I haven’t seen him do it lately. I’ve seen him do the living on a prayer, air guitar thing. And I thought it was very cute, but then, I’m a girl so I was watching his tushy and biceps the whole time! But I see where you’re coming from now, I just didn’t get what you meant, in my day, Goofy always meant stupidly wrong, and being that way in front of people on a regular basis. …I’ve always thought of him as a clean cut corn fed boy who loves football. I think he’s every Mother’s dream son. To me that’s just not goofy, it’s endearing.
"You can't defend the perfect throw, what can I say?" Peyton quoting Marino
by Indy Lori on Sep 26, 2009 5:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
He also used to dunk the ball through the uprights
I miss that one. As for everything else, I totally get what you’re saying. I guess the confusion comes in that I find goofiness endearing. Or maybe its that I find endearingness goofy. Still, I think we both have the same appreciation of him (sans the biceps and tushy part) we just express it differently.
Bullets Forever: A blog dedicated to the Washington Wizards with analysis, commentary, and more YouTube videos than your eyes can handle.
by JakeTheSnake on Sep 26, 2009 6:16 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
you guys know what happened right?
Manning probably watched every dolphins game for the last 25 years in slow motion and then stalked the defensive coordinator and every defensive player and then read the minds of every dolphin on the field. Then he walked up to clark and said “hey, they’re gonna run a cover, with the strong safety covering Reggie, if you can just run at a 76 degree angle I’ll throw the ball at about 1143 MPH and you can run down the field at an 89 degree angle and then score a touchdown. Trust me, I’ve seen the play unfold in my mind a million times.”
Then dallas just gave him a blank stare and said “Okay.”
by Colts_and_Cavs_in_09! on Sep 26, 2009 9:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
He's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!
"Do I believe in aliens?" Stephon Marbury asked. "I don't know, because I've never seen one. But I believe in Jesus because I saw him in the shower the other day."
by KMR24 on Sep 26, 2009 10:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hide the women and children.LOL
"You can't defend the perfect throw, what can I say?" Peyton quoting Marino
by Indy Lori on Sep 27, 2009 12:28 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I think that was an "Eff You" game
by BlueMagic on Sep 26, 2009 10:00 AM EDT via mobile reply actions 0 recs
I think that was an "Eff You" game
dedicated to Venus and Serena for having to do those Oreo commercials.
by BlueMagic on Sep 26, 2009 10:03 AM EDT via mobile reply actions 0 recs
I love that they made Don sit on the cooler
but I know Reggie’s butt was hurting if he sat on the top of the bench like that the whole night since the offense only played 15 minutes.
Reggie: Damn, P, my ass is killin’ me right now.
Peyton: Well sit your ass on the bench like the rest of us.
Reggie: Good idea, P! Now I know why your head is so big: It has an answer for everything!
Peyton: Yeah, I still working on curing cancer, but now I’m trying to figure out why Belichick is such a pr!ck?
Reggie: Good luck, especially with the Belichick answer.
"Do I believe in aliens?" Stephon Marbury asked. "I don't know, because I've never seen one. But I believe in Jesus because I saw him in the shower the other day."
by KMR24 on Sep 26, 2009 12:05 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
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