Colts Rap - The Real Peyton Manning

After my caption foray for that picture of Manning waving his pimp hand strong, I decided to expand mine, and give you Manning's new rap - "The Real Peyton Manning".

Do it to the tune of "The Real Slim Shady" and it makes sense.

Also, I realize that the "cats" and "welcome mats" stanza is quite reprehensible.

Hope you enjoy it!!

Y'all act like you've never seen me do work before
Jaws on the floor, like Belichick's was after 4th and two entered lore.
Now, I started whooping his ass worse than before
The league knew I could throw it galore and throw it some more.

It's the return of the Manning, "Oh wait he's kidding"
Belichick said before I turned his D to kindling







And Tom Brady says....
Nothing you idiots, Tom Brady's dead locked in Moynahan's basement

Delusional Pats fans love Tommy Brady.
"Tommy Brady, I just love him"
Look at Tom, walking around grabbing his you know what,
flipping the you know who
"Yeah but the goats so cute though".







Yeah I probably got a couple of screws up in my head lose
but no worse than what's going on in Belichick's filmroom.
Sometimes I just wanna go up to him and let loose, but I can't
but its cool for his cameramen to break all the rules?

I'm driving for the win, I'm driving for the win
and if you're lucky I might make Brady throw down a shot of gin
That's the message I'm trying to give to little kids
that it's not as important to marry a model as he thinks it is
Of course they're gonna know who Gisele is when they hit fourth grade
They got the Victoria's Secret catalogue, don't they?







"Manning, you ain't nothing but stats"
Yeah, but some of us are cats
who cut up defenses like cats do with welcome mats
But if we can cut up cats and mats and blow up Rex's blitz packs
Then there's no reason why we can't go up to Gillette and dice the Pats

But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Don't worry, I'm on the same page as Gonzo's
Sing the chorus, how's it GO!!

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Phil Rivers don't gotta run and audible under pressure.
Well I do, so screw him cause I can do more than he can do.
You think I gave a damn about the rest of the AFC?
Half the teams can't score on Freeney, let alone stop me.







"But Pey, what if you lose, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? I've done reached that high gear
I've done it all before and no one can reach levels near
After that Title Game, Rex Ryan better buy me a beer
So I can drink and tell him and Darrelle Revis
how I beat their ass, and that they'll never beat us.

That big fat slob, tried to blitz and confuse me on national TV
"Yeah, but I think he got a lap band, hee hee!"
I should download that game for the world to see
and they can see how I showed the Jets the power of me.










I'm sick of you little young teams, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you.

There's a dozen of us just like me
Who audible like me, who just burn blitzes like me
Who impress like me, who walk, talk and throw like me
and it might be the next generation, but not quite me.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

I'm great to watch to, because I'm only giving you
things you can do while I audible before I lower the boom.
The only difference is I've got the balls to do it in front of ya'll
and I don't feel the need to hurry up the snap at all.
I just get to the line and hit it
and whether you would like to admit it, I just throw it
better than every other quarterback out there.

You wonder how I can keep putting up wins by the dozens
It's funny, cause at the rate I'm going, I'm gonna be the only one throwing
Shaving Aaron Rodgers' beard, while I'm at the Super Bowl rollin'
While the Pack are folding, people will see my legend again growing








And there will one day be another me lurking
He could be at Alabama working, sucking on Nick Saban's Title Rings

In the Lucas Oil lot Brady, Bill and Rivers will be crying
Screaming out "I just give up"
with their heads down and hands cupped.

So will the real Manning please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up
And be proud in February to start rocking two rings
Cause one more time the Colts will win that thing.










Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.

Cause I'm Peyton Manning, yes the better Manning
And that other Damn Manning is just imitating
So won't the real Manning please stand up,
please take the chance to blow the Pats up.


As always, this and many other things are over at my blog, loungingpass.blogspot.com