clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Petition to Fire Russ Purnell

New, comments

Because BuffaloPhil kept riding my ass on it, here it is:

PETITION TO FIRE COLTS SPECIAL TEAMS COACH RUSS PURNELL

We, the Colts fans who frequent the fan blog Stampede Blue, hereby state in this petition that we, as Colts fans, have absolutely no faith in the coaching ability and competence of one Mr. Russell Purnell, employed by the Indianapolis Colts as their Special Teams Coordinator. We feel Mr. Purnell has failed in his duties as Special Teams Coordinator, and that his employment with the Colts be terminated immediately.

Furthermore, we feel that his poor coaching the last four years, which has resulted in some of the worst Special Teams play, statistically, in the league, should warrant his immediate termination and he be removed from the West 56th Street complex immediately. He can't clean out his desk. He can't say goodbye to anyone. He can't take with him his law books, Rolodex, or his Teddy Bear named "Spike." He must leave the building, pants around his ankles, thumb in his mouth, Private Pyle-style.

Russ Purnell, you coach Special Teams the way old people f*#k!

We ask the Indianapolis Colts and their owner, Jim Irsay, respect and honor the wishes expressed in this petition. If Mr. Irsay and his team do not, then we fans will be forced to boo the Special Teams whenever and wherever they screw up. This means we will boo them on national TV in front of a national audience, embarrassing the team, the city, and the players.

We fans simply will not tolerate Mr. Purnell continuing to stink up our Special Teams. We request his immediate dismissal. Thank you.

If you agree to this petition, sign below in the comments.