clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

BBS does his own stupid mock draft


"Mock" is a very appropriate word when it comes to drafts that I put together. Unlike Joe "shake n bake" Baker or Matt "mgrex03" Grecco, I'm not as good at picking where potential draft picks will go, and why they will go there. Therefore, this mock draft (which includes trades), is more how I think things will go based on information I've heard. If 25% of this mock turns out as I think it will, someone should buy me a drink!

Hope you enjoy the mock, and by all means mock the hell out of my mock; maybe throw in a "ya momma" joke, or four. 

BBS's really silly Mock Draft

1 1 STL Sam Bradford QB Oklahoma
Franchises are built with quarterbacks. Anyone telling you different is either an idiot or lying to your face. The Rams haven't had a franchise-level QB since Kurt Warner, and that is not saying much when you really think about it. Bradford has arm strength, accuracy, and intelligence. The knock on him is "Can he stay healthy?" Well, build a strong o-line around him using picks in rounds 2-7, and the answer is yes.
1 2 DET Ndamukong Suh DT Nebraska
The Lions defense is THE reason they have been horrible for so many years. Even when they were 0-16 two years ago, they could still score points. Stopping the other team was the problem. Jim Schwartz is a defensive-minded coach, and in his system with the Titans he had Albert Haynesworth as his big-time DT. With Suh, he gets the same caliber player, minus the douchbaggery.
1 3 TB Gerald McCoy DT Oklahoma
The Bucs Tampa-2 defense simply does not work without excellent defensive tackle play. With McCoy, head coach and defensive coordinator Raheem Morris can get back to playing "Buc Ball" with pressure coming from the interior of the Buc defense.
1 4 WAS Trent Williams OT Oklahoma
The Redskins did not trade for Donovan McNabb just to see him get sacked every other play. In a surprise move, the Skins draft the better all-around tackle in Williams over Russell Okung. There is a growing belief that Williams has a "higher ceiling" than Okung, and that his ability to play both LT and RT pleases new coach Mike Shanahan.
1 5 MIA Eric Berry
TRADE! Bill Parcells swings a trade with his son-in-law, Scott Pioli. The Dolphins pass defense was awful in 2009, and the Chiefs have made it known that they do not want to take someone like Berry with the 5th overall pick. Chiefs get Dolphins 12th pick, plus additional compensation, while the Dolphins get a game-changer on defense.
1 6 SEA Russell Okung OT
Oklahoma State
Okung is big, and (based on his talents) should pick up the torch left by Walter Jones and continue the tradition of exceptional left tackle play in Seattle. New football czar Pete Carroll might have had his eyes set on Trent Williams, but Williams is regarded s a better overall tackle, and the Redskins need better "overall" ability than raw talent. The Seahawks will settle for talent.
1 7 CLE Jimmy Clauson QB Notre Dame
A "franchise QB" falls to Mike Holmgren at pick #7. Clauson has all the physical tools to be a top caliber QB in this league. Some question his attitude, but many said the same thing about another Holmgren "project" from several years ago named Brett Favre. Browns fans will roll their eyes and claim the team is just drafting another bust QB from Notre Dame.
1 8 OAK Derrick Morgan DE Georgia Tech
Aside from the Raiders needing a competent owner and a head coach who does not physically assault his assistant coaches, they are in excellent shape in terms of overall team talent. The Raiders run a 4-3 scheme, and Morgan has the potential to be a real force in a 4-3. Since drafting another young QB is likely out of the question, Raiders go defense.
1 9 BUF Bryan Bulaga OT Iowa
The Bills offensive line was awful in 2009. Regardless of who their QB will be, they must protect him if new coach Chan Gailey is to have any opportunity to run his offense. Bulaga sitting there at #9 is too much to pass up. 
1 10 SF Anthony Davis
TRADE! The 49ers swing a trade with the Jaguars. The Jags are looking to trade out of the #10 pick, while the 49ers need to upgrade their offensive line. Davis has attitude and maturity issues, but who better to kick such issues in the testicles than head coach Mike Singletary? Jags likely score the 49ers #13 pick plus their 2nd rounder.
1 11 DEN Rolando McClain ILB Alabama
The Broncos are looking to bolster the interior of their 3-4 defense, and McClain certainly brings top tier talent to the MLB spot. He is big, physical, and can run all over the field. He can provide the Broncos the kind of high impact linebacker they have not had in some time.
1 12 KC Sergio Kindle OLB Texas
TRADE! The Chiefs need a pass rusher. They were ranked next to last in the league in 2009 in sacks with 22 total for the season. No defense, no matter how complex or talented, can work without a pass rush. The Chiefs trade down with Miami so they can score Kindle, who has the size and speed to play outside backer in Romeo Crennel's 3-4 defense.
1 13 JAC Brandon Graham DE Michigan
TRADE! Speaking of crappy pass rush, the only team worse than the Chiefs was the Jaguars. They had a grand total of 14 sacks last year. 14! Dwight Freeney (13.5) nearly had that many all by himself! The Jaguars are in desperate need of somebody, ANYBODY, to rush the passer. Enter, Brandon Graham. Lots of people are very high on this kid, and pass rushers like him rarely last past pick #15.
1 14 SEA Dez Bryant WR Oklahoma State
The Seahawks patiently sit and wait for the player they likely targeted at this spot, Dez Bryant. Carroll will want speed and playmaking ability with his wideouts, and Bryant provides that. Lots of upside here, and Carroll could care less about WRs with attitude.
1 15 NYG C.J. Spiller
RB Clemson
In a draft with very few running backs that seem like solid prospects, passing up Spiller just isn't an option. With Eli Manning and the potent passing attack they have in New York, Spiller would provide an instant spark.
1 16 TEN Jerry Hughes
DE Texas Christian
The Titans simply were not that good at getting to the QB in 2009. Hughes has risen up many draft boards, and is projected by Football Outsiders as having the most upside of any of the pass rushing prospects. Jeff Fisher is a defense-first coach, and if he wants to get his defense back to anything remotely resembling the defense he used to field in Tennessee, he needs a pass rusher.
1 17 SF Earl Thomas
S Texas
Mike Singletary likes ball hawks, and with the selection of Anthony Davis earlier, he can now turn his attention to improving his defense. Thomas has outstanding ball skills, and for a defense that works to generate turnovers, a player like Thomas is too good to pass up here.
1 18 PIT Maurkice Pouncey OG Florida
The Steelers are ga-ga over this guy, and considering that their offensive line is terrible, passing on him simply does not compute. Pouncey may very well be gone by pick #15, but if he gets here there is absolutely no way the Steelers will pass on him.
1 19 ATL Kyle Wilson CB Boise State
Yeah, the Falcons were pretty awful at pass defense in 2009. They've since jettisoned cornerback Chris Houston and signed Dunta Robinson. Now, they need to continue to rebuild their spotty secondary. Wilson getting drafted before Joe Haden will raise some eyebrows, but at the end of the day Wilson has the talent on both defense and special teams to make an immediate difference.
1 20 HOU Joe Haden CB Florida
The Texans play in a division that features four-time NFL MVP Peyton Manning. Their pass defense in 2009 was not that great, and they have never had a corner back that can man-up against a player like Reggie Wayne. Haden could provide that.
1 21 CIN Jermaine Gresham TE Oklahoma
For as long as I can remember, the Bengals have searched for a pass-catching TE. At pick 21, they finally get their man in Jermaine Gresham. He's big, has good speed, and is the top TE prospect by a pretty wide margin.
1 22 NE Everson Griffen
DE Texas
Trading Richard Seymour last year sent a clear signal that the Patriots were re-building their defense. With the 6'3, 280 pound Griffen, the Pats get a guy who is sturdy against the run and provides great versatility. These are crucial in a Bill Belichick defense.
1 23 GB Mike Iupati OG Idaho
The Packers offensive line was a mess in 2009, including the final play of their season, which saw Aaron Rodgers get sacked and fumble the football to Karlos Dansby for the game-winning defensive TD. The Packers must upgrade their o-line, and it starts with Iupati. 
1 24 PHI Bruce Campbell
OT Maryland
With Kevin Kolb now the unquestioned starter, and with a solid stockpile of talent at the skill positions, the Eagles need to turn their attention to the o-line. Injuries decimated their line last year, and the benefit of Campbell is he can play both guard or tackle. 
1 25 BAL Kareem Jackson CB Alabama
Corner is a big position of need for the Ravens. Chris McAlister is long gone, and in a division that features the passing attacks of the Bengals and Steelers, a contender like the Ravens needs better corners. Jackson can tackle, hit, and cover. That's exactly the kind of player John Harbaugh loves.
1 26 ARI Jason Pierre-Paul DE South Florida
Pierre-Paul has tremendous upside, but many are wondering if his talent will translate into production at the pro level. With defensive end Bertrand Berry now retired, the Cardinals are pretty desperate for pass rushing help. Pierre-Paul could provide a strong, physical presence on the line or as a stand-up rusher in Arizona's 3-4 scheme.
1 27 DAL Taylor Mays
Ken Hamlin is gone, and the Cowboys need to get a top-flight safety in a division that will feature Donovan McNabb with the Redskins and Eli Manning opening a new stadium with the Giants. The Cowboys could have gone LT here, but Doug Free seems to be "the guy." Mays is a physical, BIG safety who can hit.
1 28 SD Dan Williams DT Tennessee
The loss of Jamal Williams last season did significant damage to the Chargers; maybe more than we were led to believe. Look no further then the Bolts playoff loss to the Jets. With the style of defense Ron Rivera runs there, the team absolutely must have quality depth at DT. Williams is a perfect nose tackle for this system and would thrive in SD.
1 29 NYJ Jared Odrick
WR Penn State
Rex Ryan is salivating at having Jared Odrick fall past New England and into his hands. At 6'6, 308, Odrick has the speed and strength to hold up at DE in Ryan's scheme. He might even be able to play some DT as well.
1 30 MIN Brian Price
How many more years does "The Williams Wall" have left? One? Maybe two? At some point, the Vikings need to consider a younger option at DT in Leslie Frazier's hybrid Tampa-2 system. Price is a penetrating DT who plays like a demon unleashed.
1 31 IND Charles Brown OT USC
The #1 priority of the Colts has to be offensive line going into the draft, and while the club might be changing philosophies on how best to block up front, the one constant is that Peyton Manning must be protected. Brown is an excellent pass blocker, but needs to work on his run blocking.
1 32 NO Sean Weatherspoon
LB Missouri
Who Dat! Nation replaces Scott Fujita (who departed via free agency) with Weatherspoon, a quick, aggressive LBer who can run all over the field.