/cdn.vox-cdn.com/photo_images/5329183/137557748.jpg)
Predictification [pri-dikt-if-i-keyt-shuhn]: The making or causing of an event based on one's cerebral powers outside of natural scientific knowledge.
Predicting an NFL Season from start to finish is tough - at least I would think it is if you aren't a predictificationist like me. Want to know how I knew about the Wes Welker trade? It's complicated.... and cost me $79.95. (Wait... what? Welker is still with the Patriots? I want a refund!)
All season long I will be using my 'predictification' powers to satisfy your desires.... at least the desire to know the end result of a football game before it happens. Only a select few have been blessed with this unique gift and I'm nice enough to share it with you.
You're welcome. (See how powerful they are... I sensed you saying 'thank you' in my mind)
According to me, the Giants will miss the playoffs this year, the Cardinals will have the #1 pick to fix their awful quarterback situation and the Packers will again flirt with perfection. The Colts will TRIPLE their win total from a year ago and still miss the playoffs. I need to warn you ahead of time: the strength of these powers is so intense it can cause you to lash out at the predificationer... This is natural and can be done in the comments below.
(z = Home Field, y = First Round Bye, x = Division Winner, * = Wildcard)
AFC SOUTH
x-Houston Texans 11-5
Indianapolis Colts 6-10
Tennessee Titans 6-10
Jacksonville Jaguars 4-12
AFC NORTH
z-Baltimore Ravens 12-4
*Pittsburgh Steelers 12-4
Cleveland Browns 3-13
AFC EAST
y-New England Patriots 12-4
New York Jets 7-9
Buffalo Bills 6-10
Miami Dolphins 4-12
AFC WEST
x-Denver Broncos 10-6
*Kansas City Chiefs 9-7
Oakland Raiders 5-11
NFC SOUTH
x-Atlanta Falcons 11-5
*New Orleans Saints 11-5
Tampa Bay Buccs 5-11
NFC NORTH
z-Green Bay Packers 14-2
*Chicago Bears 11-5
Detroit Lions 10-6
Minnesota Vikings 3-13
NFC EAST
x-Philadelphia Eagles 10-6
New York Giants 10-6
Dallas Cowboys 8-8
Washington Redskins 5-11
NFC WEST
y-San Francisco 49ers 13-3
Seattle Seahawks 9-7
St. Louis Rams 4-12
Arizona Cardinals 3-13
WILDCARD ROUND:
Texans over Chiefs, Broncos over Steelers
Falcons over Saints, Eagles over Bears
DIVISIONAL ROUND:
Ravens over Texans, Patriots over Broncos
Packers over Eagles, Falcons over 49ers
CHAMPIONSHIP ROUND:
Ravens over Patriots
Packers over Falcons
SUPER BOWL:
Ravens over Packers
My Week 1 picks will be posted on Tuesday night. As a licensed predificationologist I must deter you from using these picks to gamble any money. Predictification is not an exact science and you could be risking money that could be put to better use here.
Make sure you're following me all season long on Twitter at @Coltsinsiders. If you don't you're likely to miss my next big trade prediction....