Jared Bets the NFL Week 17

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This is a somber day for me as a young man I’d long since been friends with and had recently recruited to play defensive tackle on an adult recreational football team I’ll be coaching (called the Indiana Cutters) has passed away. Rest in power Rakim Mockabee. He appears to have died from a heart attack on New Years Eve. He was my friend for about the last decade and played football at St. Francis and then well into his 20s including just this past year for the Marion County Crusaders.

Let’s get to the games!

HOME TEAM IN ALL CAPS, pick in bold

Ravens -13.5 vs. BENGALS OR BENGALS +13.5

If memory serves, CEH is out with an injury and the Ravens must win this game. However, the Bengals are at home and have the opportunity to spoil and I consider that when I bet (I don’t know about any of you), so whilst I think the Ravens can absolutely blow out the Bengals, I’m going to bet like this. Either take the Ravens straight up or pick the Bengals and all those points.

Dolphins vs. BILLS -1

I will be wildly disappointed if I’m wrong but won’t suffer otherwise, but I’ve been on the #BillsMafia hype train and I’ve got them winning this week. Many of my fantasy teams featured young Josh Allen at its QB this year. The Dolphins are surprising, I’ll admit. The spread is concerning.

Steelers vs. BROWNS -9 or Steelers +9

Let me set the record straight. The Steelers are covering up for the fact that Big Ben is washed and are 100% running from Myles Garrett by benching Big Ben claiming rest. Mason Rudolph is the human sacrifice this week in sports. I’d just take the Browns straight up or the Steelers and all those points.

Cowboys -1.5 vs. GIANTS

I can’t believe, given their records, that this is a meaningful contest in December. That said, my wife loathes Jerry Jones and as we married few know, you don’t cross the Mrs.. Take the Giants to beat the booze out of the Boys today! For prosperity!

Falcons vs. BUCCANEERS -7

Let me speak this into existence by saying I love the underdog and actively root for spoilers. However, the Falcons can’t get out of their own way and the Bucs are playing to go to the Playoffs. I can 100% see someone taking the points, too. Maybe Brady is washed, too.

Vikings -3.5 vs. LIONS

The Lions are just very bad and I have no expectation of them winning this game, but the line is concerning in that I expected it to be bigger. The Vikings are probably doing some shuffling after this season, too. Hmm. Sure. SKOL it is.

Jets vs. PATRIOTS -3

Look, the Jets beat the Browns last week and if that doesn’t make you second guess yourself, I don’t know what to tell you. The Patriots should 100% win this game and cover at home, but Cam’s recent play has just been so awful. Consider this a hate pick.

Packers -4.5 vs. BEARS

The Colts beat both of these teams and while Khalil Mack is a dangerous man, it’s Aaron Rodgers that should strike fear in folks. Packers cap this great season with a huge road win in Soldier Field.

Titans -7 vs. TEXANS +7

The Titans are probably going to win this game, but again, wouldn’t it be sweet if the Texans spoiled their season? Doesn’t take the 7-point home underdog to spoil feel sweeter? Snap back to reality. The Titans should own the Texans today. I say “Should”.

Jaguars +14 vs. COLTS -14

This spread is dangerous! Of course I believe in my heart of hearts that the Colts are going to win all day, but this is sports betting, not playing favorites! The Jaguars always hang with the Colts and the Colts can be a victim of bad officiating and make mental mistakes in bad spots. I’d honestly take the Jags and all those points.

Seahawks -7 vs. 49ERS or 49ers +7

Of course, the Seahawks are playing for seeding and the 49ers are just set to spoil. Wouldn’t it be nice if Colin Kaep— anyway. Look, the Seahawks are going to win but can’t play defense. This is, however, a familiar foe. I’d take the Seahawks to win or the 49ers and all those points.

Saints -5.5 vs. PANTHERS or PANTHERS +5.5

This is basically the end for Drew Brees. Win this game, move on to the Playoffs and set sail for sports commentary after that. Lose and... you know what? I like Teddy Bridgewater and can see someone betting the Saints straight up or taking the Panthers and all those points to spoil.

Cardinals vs. RAMS

In Vegas terms, this is a pick’em. I’ve seen lines .5 either way. The bottom line is do you believe Aaron Donald can win this game for your or will Kyler Murray do it? I’m more inclined to bet on the QB, but AD is a game changer. Bet with your heart or bet on girth. Haha.

Chargers -5.5 vs. CHIEFS or CHIEFS +5.5

Obviously, the Chiefs are resting starters. I don’t think Justin Herbert is a QB you give up on scouting because he’s a conference foe... I’m not like most people, I guess. I think the Chargers win this game, but would take the Chiefs and all those points instead.

Raiders -2.5 vs. BRONCOS

As you can imagine by now, I simply have no faith in Derek Carr. I like Drew Lock, but have to acknowledge that the Broncos are super injured when considering who to take. The Raiders win and I’ll take the points, but only because of the injuries to the Broncos.

Washington -5.5 vs. EAGLES or EAGLES +5.5

I like Meek Mill and don’t believe for a second that Washington is the best in the NFC East. That said, I can see taking Washington to win straight up, but otherwise, give me the home underdog and all those points!