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Weekly Wagers 13: Will this be our luckiest week so far?

Please don’t bet any money based on anything you read here.

NFL: Tennessee Titans at Indianapolis Colts
Actual photo of Pehs
Hali Tauxe-USA TODAY Sports

Sports betting is all the rage, but I’m not very good at it. This year I’m determined to figure out how to beat the odds once and for all but I’ll need a little help to make it happen.

It turns out that I happen to know a sports betting expert, he goes by Pehs online, and he’s totally not my brother. You can find him on Twitter @NeverNotNick. There are several things in this article that I don’t recommend and following him on Twitter is at the top of that list.

Pehs (pronounced like the candy) has spent years as a degenerate gambler practicing and honing his methods, and this year I’ve asked him to share what he’s learned with me and give me a few picks each week. The goal is that every week he’ll give us three picks. His Best Bet for Beginners, the You Shouldn’t Do This, But I Totally Am Bet, and the Pehs Dispenser- his lock of the week is always a sweet treat.

In order for Pehs to agree to do this, I had to agree to place a bet of his choosing on the Colts each and every week. So we’ll be keeping track of my wins and losses via the Mandatory Weekly Wager.

Week 12 Recap

Let’s take a quick look at what picks Pehs gave us last time :

#1: Best Bet for Beginners- The New York Jets +10 against the Miami Dolphins. DraftKings gave this -112 odds so a $10 bet would have paid out $18.92, but the Dolphins blew out the Jets.

BBB Total Yearly Winnings*= $13.50 (4-7 record on the year)

#2: You Shouldn’t Do This, But I Totally Am- was a five way parlay taking the over in the Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Houston Texans game (47.5), the over in the New Orleans Saints vs. Atlanta Falcons game (41.5), the over in the Kansas City Chiefs vs. Las Vegas Raiders gamer (42.5), the Los Angles Rams -1.5 over the Arizona Cardinals and the Chicago Bears +3 to cover against the Minnesota Vikings. Draftkings gave this one +2437 odds so a $10 bet would have paid out $253.71, but much like the 2017 Cleveland Browns, this bet maintains its perfect record.

YSDTBITA Total Yearly Winnings*= -$110.00 (0-11 record on the year)

#3: Pehs Dispenser (lock of the week)- the Baltimore Ravens -3.5 over the Los Angeles Chargers. DraftKings gave this one -108 odds so a $10 bet paid out $19.25 and it was a winner!

Pehs Dispenser Total Yearly Winnings*= $65.40 (6-5 record on the year)

#4: My Mandatory Weekly Wager- a two way parlay the Colts to win and the over (43.5). DraftKings gave this +222 odds so my $2 bet paid out $6.45!

My Mandatory Weekly Wager Total Yearly Winnings= -$1.91 (3-8 record on the year)

*” winnings” assumes a $10 bet and the cost of the initial $10.

Week 13 Best Bet for Beginners:

This week’s BBB is take the over in the Kansas City Chiefs vs. Green Bay Packers game. DraftKings has the over/under set at 43 and is giving it -108 odds so a $10 bet would pay out $19.25.

Pehs Says:

Kansas City is coming off a tough loss to the Philadelphia Eagles. The Packers are playing their best football right now. I see this being a 28-24 game or a 35-10 game. Either way 43 points isn’t enough points.

Week 13 You Shouldn’t Do This But I Totally Am:

This week’s YSDTBITA is a three way parlay of George Kittle to score a touchdown, the Over to hit in the Dolphins vs. Commanders game, and the Colts defense/special teams to score a touchdown. DraftKings is giving this one +2322 odds so a $10 bet will pay out $242.26.

Pehs Says:

The Commanders are a bad team, the Dolphins might hang 40 on them. Maybe a 50 burger. Kittle might have a touchdown every week until the end of the year. Purdy has looked good since the losing streak ended.

NOTE: this bet was supposed to include Brock Purdy to throw 2+ touchdown passes and the Colts defensive/ special teams score wasn’t included. DraftKings isn’t letting that bet go through now, so I audibled to this bet after talking to Pehs earlier in the day. He likes the Indy defense to do something against a bad Titans offense, so why not tack it on to this impossible bet?

Week 13 Pehs Dispenser:

In his lock of the week, Pehs is taking the Miami Dolphins -9 to cover against the Washington Commanders. DraftKings is giving this bet -110 odds so a $10 bet pays out 19.09.

Pehs Says:

This just seems like one of those games the Commanders don’t stand a chance in. RIP to Riverboat Ron.

Week 13 Mandatory Weekly Wager:

In agreeing to do this article Pehs wanted me to place a weekly bet and I agreed as long as it could be a bet on the Indianapolis Colts. This week’s MWW: to take the over. DraftKings has the over/under for this one set at 42 and they’re giving it -112 odds so my $2 bet will pay out $3.78.

Pehs Says:

I hate this pick so much I love it. We just have to believe the Titans are going to score at least 14 points.

That’s all for week thirteen with Pehs, who is totally not my brother, and despite his picks in this weekly article is somehow up (a lot) in his personal bets on the season.

Let us know what your best bet is this week and if you beat the Pehs Dispenser, I’ll make Pehs answer for it next week.

Can’t Bet List:

Cincinnati Bengals

Buffalo Bills